Did I really get to my forties and just forget to have children? Are there others out there like me? 🖋️ k8_lister for ipaperviews
Perhaps what makes me feel so unsure about not having kids is that I was once firmly on the path to motherhood. I was in a 10-year relationship with someone I loved very deeply. We were engaged. My fiancé and I spoke at length about what our children’s names would be, how curly their hair would be, how we would raise them, and so forth. And then it all went to hell.
The stigma around being single is as pervasive as the stigma around being childfree. We are all raised on social scripts that equate being single with being a bit of a failure. People are quick to reassure you that “you’ll find someone” when you tell them you’re single. They cock their heads and purse their lips at you, while making a pained face that communicates how sorry they are that you are not partnered up.
If I had married my fiancé, I am certain we would have had children. We talked about having two and if everything has gone according to plan, I think those children would be between five and seven by now. I am sure I would have been a wonderful mum, but there is no way I could have the lifestyle I do now if I had children. And I really do enjoy where I am right now.
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