“Human beings are basically wired to want to give help; it’s rewarding, not to mention one of the richest sources of self-esteem.”
“Asking for help is daunting, even when it’s quite a simple request, because many of us have learnt to not ask for help in our lives,” says McMahon. “It’s putting someone else out, we feel we should be able to do it alone, and we fear what others may think of us.
Of course, there’s also the fact that people wildly underestimate the odds that others will help us, which leads us to assume that our request may be rejected.and find it difficult to relinquish that. But, as a society, we have created a stigma around asking for help, not being OK, and needing more,” continues McMahon.
“These questions serve to help us break down some of the barriers to getting support, understand why we worry about what might happen, ruminate on previous experiences, and figure out the right person or people to turn to – ideally someone you can trust and rely on.
“If you notice these unhelpful thoughts, take a breath and change the narrative. Try affirmations such as, ‘I’m glad I said something, because now I’m not alone with this’, or ‘We all struggle from time to time; it’s not embarrassing, it’s normal’.”Psychology: the rise of the social vampire, and how to handle the one in your life
Belgique Dernières Nouvelles, Belgique Actualités
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