“The sob that burst out of me folded me over my knees.'
"She told me she was 'so, so sorry,' then we messaged all morning. I started by asking her name," the author writes.
When I texted, he texted back. If he was running late, he let me know. When we cooked together, he did the dishes. We’d agreed no gifts for Christmas, but before I went to spend the holiday with family, he gave me a wrapped chef’s knife. Instead of partying with friends on New Year’s, we drove down the Oregon Coast, past Cannon Beach, to an A-frame on a cliff overlooking the sea, which shuddered in powerful gusts. He woke me at midnight to kiss me and say happy new year. On the morning of the 1st, I read “Atomic Habits” to him as we sat by the fire he’d made, waves bursting against sea stacks below.
“Hi, Paulette. You don’t know me, but I just got off the phone with the guy I’ve been seeing for the past month. Apparently, you have also been seeing him.” She’d cancelled plans with girlfriends to spend Christmas with him. For New Year’s, she camped with her kids, the wind beating the roof of her yurt, him texting about how snowy it was in Seattle and how he couldn’t wait to enjoy 2022 together.
Each of his lies I learned about during our conversation hit like a pellet of the buckshot. Just that Thursday, he’d driven directly from my hug goodbye to hers hello. It had never been a gym bag. The text he sent me for my photoshoot, he must have snuck when she stepped out of the room. When we drove home from Oregon, we’d passed her, a few towns north. Before she and I knew each other, we’d shivered from the same wind.
We weren’t like that. Our dark camaraderie formed as if we were neighbours in the hospice of our love lives, a focus on temporary relief from the suffering rather than hope for a cure.I had myself another kind of companion.
Belgique Dernières Nouvelles, Belgique Actualités
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