'I thought we were doing OK,' writes Lori Fradkin 'I was tightly wound in the way most parents were and certainly the conditions were not ideal, but I kept thinking the kids, at least, were not missing much. Now I’m a little less sure'
Doing my job from home, skipping parties, RSVP’ing no to weddings. None of it felt like a major sacrifice to me, or at least I couldn’t justify the participation weighed against the risks. To be fair, I am not someone who needs a lot of in-person interaction. I catch up with close friends when I see them, but even in non-pandemic times, I rely on the fact that we have a solid foundation and sometimes go for long stretches in between.
Still, for all the talk of the very real isolation that children have experienced during the pandemic, I was not especially concerned about mine. We were fortunate to have consistent childcare for all but the first three exhausting months, so our kids spent nearly every weekday of the summer of 2020 in the park with their friends. We got to know families in the neighborhood and met for picnics and soccer. We layered with long underwear and ate under heat lamps when it got cold.
Now I’m a little less sure. This summer, the month after the trip with my husband’s family, we traveled to meet my parents, grandparents, aunt, uncle, and cousins in Colorado. We stayed in a handful of units in the same condominium, and most of us were together for a full week. My kids got to meet their baby cousin, and they asked for her every morning as soon as they woke up. They enlisted family members for games of Candy Land and jumps on the wobbling bridge at the playground.
Perhaps it is simply vacation I’m romanticizing, or having more grown-ups around to entertain my kids, but I don’t think so. One day, as my younger son and I walked down the road, he told me he really likes our family. Several times, I looked over at my kids playing with my relatives,relatives, forming their own bonds, and felt something that I rarely feel about being with other people: longing, the desire for more of this.
I don’t regret how my husband and I have behaved during the pandemic. We’ve done our best to take care of our kids in the face of a disease whose
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