'Regardless of what you think about the leak, what Brady and Hill’s texts do is show us how emotional abuse can manifest,' writes Myisha Battle
” is “prescriptive language describing certain psychological concepts and behaviors.” But exactly how toxic can therapy speak be? Is it possible that Hill believed he was just advocating for his needs in his relationship? In a world that’s now very tuned in to therapeutic practices and terms, it’s important to understand the difference between advocating for ourselves and inflicting our will upon people we care about.
To be fair, there are plenty of people on spiritual paths who do not use tactics of manipulation and control within their intimate relationships. And there are plenty of people in therapy who are able to navigate their boundaries in healthy ways when in partnership. The trouble is, we often find it difficult to spot toxic misuse of spirituality or deep self-work, for ourselves and in others. The Brady-Hill debacle highlights something that has been in existence, but perhaps has a new form.
For many of us, being in therapy is new. Some folks may have never been in therapy and what they know about boundaries, gaslighting, and narcissism is from social media, which can deliver quippy memes, but don’t get to the root of what these terms mean. The problem with this type of education about boundaries, specifically, is that it misses the relational nuance of what it means to enforce a boundary.People typically don’t just say “this is my boundary,” and that’s the end of the discussion.
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