I Used To Talk Proudly About My Size 14 Body, But In Private I Wept That I ‘Wasn’t Thin Enough’

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I Used To Talk Proudly About My Size 14 Body, But In Private I Wept That I ‘Wasn’t Thin Enough’
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For every unselfconscious 20-something wielding gloriously thick thighs in cycling shorts, there is a 40-something still dreaming of fitting into her 28-inch jeans, writes Farrah Storr.

The truth is, I don’t know when it happened. Maybe somewhere between Lindy West’s book Shrill hitting stores and a size 24 Tess Holiday landing on the cover of Cosmopolitan magazine. All I know is that over the course of a few short years, big became beautiful, diet was a dirty word and I was left feeling like the most old fashioned woman on earth.

Of course, this is deeply unfashionable to admit. But it is true. It is why Victoria Beckham landed herself in a world of pain last week when she gave an interview to Grazia magazine in which she said: ‘It’s an old-fashioned attitude — wanting to be really thin…Women today want to look healthy and curvy.'

Beckham, like myself, was born in the 1970s, which means our adolescences were played out in both the 80s and 90s. A lot happened to bodies between 1970 and 1999. Those three decades alone encompassed America’s fitness culture, the low-fat food movement and the advent of extreme diets.

After that I kept quiet about bodies. If I was on a diet I kept schtum. The only women I could talk to about my weight were those older than me, and even then we spoke about it in such hushed tones it was as though we were plotting an Anthrax attack.

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